Mommy Dearest

So, todays entry isn't that insight full, I've been meaning to wright this bit for a while now.. I just havn't come to do so until now. My mother has been pissing me off. She makes me angry to the very depths of my soul. I can't stand how much controll over my emotions that she has. Though I do not let her see it, I have all these feelings of hate harboring inside me. I just want to scream and yell and make my anger known. I was thinking about her last night, and this is what I came up with to say to her:

Shut up.

Just shut up.

I don't really care what you have to say anymore.

And I don't really think you've ever given a damn about what I had to say.

So if you'd kindly step back, shut the hell up and plant a bullet in your skull, that'd be splendid.

Please refrain from bleeding on the carpet. It has just been cleaned.

But otherwise, have fun dying. You sack of shit.

But as you probably figured, I will never say such a thing to her [even if she's said and done much worse to me]. That would just be putting myself on the lowest level. I don't know what I want to tell her... that there was too harsh. But it makes my feelings known. I don't know. She just isn't the best person in my life, never has been, and never will be.